The Two Precious

There are two ladies in my life that I could not leave without; they are not my parents nor my girlfriend, but my life – Hoiyan and Meilinda.

Hoiyan

Meilinda

I have the honour getting to know them in my secondary school, Bartley. When I was younger, I never thought of having 2 girls as my best friend because everyone knows me as someone who would go around breaking girls’ heart or vice versa. To me, it’s incredibly amazing that these two accepted me for who I am even though I was notorious back then with records of fighting, defiant and a lousy student.

The Class!

I got to know Hoiyan when we were in Sec 1. She was my Mandarin class classmate. She was very quiet back then, very serious in her work and always score in her subject. We never exchange conversation and when I open my mouth to speak to her, it would most probably be a request on asking if I could copy her work because my Mandarin back then was atrocious.

Fast forward to Secondary 3, she became my classmate (3N1). Still, I do not dare to approach her because I know good students like her would not want to hang out with bad students like me. I do not know what happen but things got better after some time. One of the reasons would be that she is seated behind me during Chinese lesson and I remembered vividly that I use to disturb this girl, Si Xuan. Because of that, I kept got scolded by buddy. However we communicated and laughed, deep down in my heart, I still am feeling inferior when it comes to being her friend.

Sec 4 came and we were in the same class again, this time round, she is seated beside me. Because of that, I would always tease her because I love teasing people, especially those who do not retaliate. She was very much open up and becomes very cheerful. And that was when we started talking more often and we would always take the same bus home together. Not only that, she became my ‘secretary’ filing my worksheets and notes because I am someone lazy, but at the same time, love being neat. Contradicting huh? She would always help me take down notes and do ‘correction’ for me because I will always be seen sleeping in class.

Our friendship blossom and we often go out together as a group even until now. The common area that we shared in my opinion would be that we are always the ONLY two Singaporeans present in the big group of Indonesia, Thailand and Nepal clique.

The Clique!

I felt that buddy is someone who is very weak, maybe because of her petite size. I always have the urge to want to protect her and frankly speaking, I dote on her a lot. Though she would always entertain me by laughing at my jokes which are often not funny, I appreciate it a lot. I know school is tiring, yet she needs to endure my nonsense all the way from Woodlands to Hougang but would still call me and ask if I want to go home with her together. Because of these calls and occasional texts I got from her, I felt loved by her and thank god to have her in my life.

As for Meilinda, I remember very clearly that I know her since the last day of my Sec 2 in the school canteen. Just as what I am like, I randomly teased her by asking if she have been hanging out with this guy named Derek.

Coincidentally, she became my Sec 3 classmate and a very hardworking girl like buddy, but results were just average. She was more outspoken with lots of friends that always surround her like Jamlin, Ericsson and Wei Hao. Though she is more outspoken than buddy, it was only until Sec 4 that I grew closer to her. I guess it’s because of her wanting to set up surprises for one of my classmates and we have to fork out money that I started interacting with her. She was/is always the one coming up with surprises and I reckon why a lot of people actually liked her. She is selfless and always thinks about others more than herself.

The Surprises!

I still remember during the N level period in Sec 4, I was very nervous about Principles of Accounts (POA) because I almost slept through my Sec 3 and Sec 4 POA lesson. I called Meilinda and ask if she could teach me because she was very good in her POA back then. Even until now, whenever I needed help, she is always the first person that comes to my mind. Because of her never-give-up attitude towards teaching me the subject, I manage to get a Band 2 in my POA N level and shock my POA teacher, Mrs Yeo. From then on, I started having interest in Accounts and even took it during my ITE days.

The Study Group!

Meilinda always give me the impression of being very strong and very responsible. She always wants her friends to be really happy around her but deep down, she is very weak and needs a lot of love and attention from the people she adore. Though I am always seen bickering and hitting her when we were out together, she is still very much loved by me. If only she is not someone whom I know very well, I would consider giving it a try into pulling her into a relationship! She is a super ideal girlfriend, and until now, I still could not figure out why people in his right mind would want to break her heart so much, sometimes I just felt that every tears that she shed have got something to do with me and I am always feeling very guilty.

These amazing ladies actually did lots of things with me like surprising me during my birthday; shopping and hunting of food; chalet; gossiping about others; sharing of problems; Karaoke sessions; and the most recent one, TRAVELLING!

Before this trip to Genting, I actually did a survey on asking a group of girls if they would mind spending a few nights with a male friends overseas in the same hotel room and most of them actually gave ‘no’ as the answer. That is why I am greatly touched by their gesture of asking me to the trip and even allowing me into the same room as them. Due to the fact that they know me more than I know myself, they should know what kind of guy I am and still trusted me which I felt very touched and loved because they see me as their very good and close friend thus do not mind.

After the trip, our bond got stronger and that these words that I’ve just written do not do justice on how important they are to me in my life, but deep down inside, I love them more than life.

I love you Meilinda and Buddy! Always!

One Last Message for my darlings:

I only carry bags for you girls

I love you girls more than life.

A People Place

If this is not a place where tears are understood,
Where do I go to cry?

If this is not a place where my spirits can take wing,
Where do I go to fly?

If this is not a place where my questions can be asked,
Where do I go to seek?

If this is not a place where my feelings can be heard,
Where do I go to speak?

If this is not a place where you’ll accept me as I am,
Where can I go to be?

If this is not a place where I can try to learn and grow,
Where can I be just me?

-William J Crockett-

I am filled with anger, sadness and disappointment. Above are the poem that could actually express the situation, feelings and questions I have now.

Do not wish to type more. Hope to blog again real soon.

New Environment

A blink of an eye, my first semester in Republic Polytechnic has passed. This school definitely let me see myself alot more clearly. During this first semester, lots of things happened. From me having lots of friends surrounding me to being an outcast. Joined Dragon boat as my Interest Group and being an outcast too, I guess. Am really sad for being an outcast because all the while in my years of education, I was always the centre of attention. Everyone will notice me, although in a bad way, I still have a bunch of good friends surrounding me and going out with me. However, in this Polytechnic, everything went vice versa.

In this tiny classroom of not more than 30 students, we are expected to work in groups of 4-5 in order to produce a quality powerpoint presentation to the problem given during the first meeting. I always act as a leader during group work in the past, hence when someone were to take this leadership role during this group discussion in Republic Polytechnic, I feel unease. I did not know how to follow people's instruction. I love doing it my own way. But in this school, I have to comprimise and everyone has a chance, hence I learn to work as a group, being a follower. I remembered going out of control and becoming back to my usual self after one week of school, I bash up a kid 2 years my junior. He was my classmate. My temper got arouse after he made negative multiple comments about my presentation and the overall presentation. This was when everything starts to change. From the usual group eating together at the food court, I was caught packeting my lunch and going back to the errie classroom eating alone. From the usual fun I had with the classmates, I was caught playing games in the internet. However, I still stay competitive by giving my best during class and group discussion because I was hungry for a daily grade of at least a 'B'. It was only during the final days - close to end of first semester that I apologize to those I had hurt, mentally. I got to realise that I always speak bluntly, without thinking. When the things I said was meant for a joke, others may think otherwise. It was also then I realise that I am not a good leader for the groups I lead, because I am more autocractic than democratic. I need people to listen to me, I need people to follow what I do so that I could secure a good grade, and neglected the whole team performances. I regretted acting in such childish-ly manner when most of my classmates could act maturely even though they are younger than me. I regretted. Just a few days ago, I got back a very disappointing result of GPA 3.2 that I finally woke up from all these nonsense and hope to start anew in my second and subsequent semester in Republic Polytechnic. I hope for the best, not just to me but everyone else.

W45F'09

I never consider myself as a sporty person, but I joined Dragon Boat. This thought of joining never cross my mind but I joined nevertheless because my secondary school friend encourage. I am still in the team, but likewise in the classroom, I am not happy. Perhaps is the way I act that makes people not wanting to come near or even speak to me. Being in this team actually makes me feel really inferior. Everyone is so physically fit. Those who are not had gave up and leave the team, and I am still the only one left in this team who are the odd one out. I do not have great paddling skills nor do I have toned muscles. When they are loud, I became soft, when they are louder and even more confident, I became softer and felt more inferior. Because of this infeiority that I started using what I do most, talk, to hurt their feelings. Actually the more I hurt them with my words, the more my weaknesses are potrayed out. I never felt that I am needed in the team. Perhaps because of the consistency of my attendence is not there. When there are choices to be made prior to Dragon Boat, I neglect Dragon Boat. I never prioritise it and this makes me think if I have make the wrong decision. I have a burning passion for this sports and I hope that I could excel in it. But there are no team bonding between myself and the team. There are only a few friends that are constantly talking to me and the secondary school friend of mine is excluded. I thought I might have a chance to blend in together with them since I have a friend inside, but I was wrong. I never felt so inferior, I never felt so left out and I never felt so lousy before. However, I will not give up and will continue to stay and fight on, hopefully one day I could blend in well with them and actually call them 'us'.

During this semester holiday, the above problems actually became clearer, to the point that I would question myself if I have any friends. I have no one calling me out, I have no one helping me to celebrate my birthday like before and I have no one being there for me when I need them most. At this point of time, I have no friends at all. However, just when I was about to break down feeling even more inferior and outcasted, my ITE friends called for me to join them for a gathering at Sentosa. Frankly speaking, I thought I was dreaming because I never expected them to remember me. I was elated. When I meet up with them to go Sentosa together, I felt like I am one of them. They did not give me the feeling of being outcasted neither do they give me the feeling of being unloved. They chatted with me asking me about my life in Republic Polytechnic, they make fun of me like they use to when we are in ITE, they are the bunch whom I could consider friends. They still call me 'Ah Dick', nothing changes. Their gesture and the fun we had together really makes me want to forget everything and spend quality time with them. Actually, it really gives me this feeling of regret, regret for coming to Polytechnic and not stay there and study with them. They are indeed my friends, I love them.

Friends Forever

After all these that I had wrote, the negative side of me. I gotta say goodbye to my negative side and be positive like what I am before. I would never break down and will definitely watch what I say, And hopefully one day, I could really come to this blog again to pen down how much I love about Republic Polytechnic.

Reminising the Past...

As I was reminiscing about the past, primary school days especially. I felt that I have had transform a lot in a person. The characteristics of me changed to a better one. Drastically is the word use to describe the change in me. Out of the blue, I thought of the upcoming National Day.

Singapore is going to be 44 years of age. The always changing nation I would describe it as. From a fishing village, to a successful trading port back in the olden days. Gone through Japanese Occupation and racial riots. Been through merging and separation. Changes the name twice(Temasek and Syonan-to) I supposed before naming it 'Singapura'. Creation of the High Rise Buildings for citizens to stay while clearing all the slums. Been attracting Multi-National Companies (MNCs) to invest in Singapore and rebate their taxes. Organising campaigns to shape Singaporeans into responsible citizens. Until now, attracting foreign talents to settle down in Singapore and start a family to contribute to Singapore's population as it is dropping.

In my opinion, I really felt that given just 44 years(even younger than my parents), Singapore had transform into a country which is recognised worldwide. Talk about 'clean and green' and a Brazilian babe will spout out 'SINGAPORE' naturally. Talk about world class airport and any Tom, Dick and Harry would agree Singapore owns it. Singapore is not a country anymore, its more than that, its a brand. It is a world class branded which could win any branded (LV, Gucci, Hermes and etc) single handedly. Another example on why Singapore is more than a country. Take Michael P. Fay for example. He was an American fellow who came to Singapore and steals and even scratches any car he sighted on the street or in the car park got caned four strokes even after the appeal of a powerful country, USA. Singapore is also a country without the fear of seeing riots or protests on the streets. Anyone who wants to protest should send in their application and go indoor. International Monetary Fund (IMF) held in Singapore laugh at us but we are firm with our rules and regulations. It is because of all these that Singapore is ranked the top 10 worldwide for its security. I am truly amazed how such small island could make such huge impact to the world.

Back to the subject, I reminisced about the past. I remembered very clearly that when I was in Primary 5, I was taken to the National Day Parade(NDP), it was 2001 then. I still remember how awesome the feeling was holding my Primary School flag and leading other school mates into the stadium to watch the NDP. When the ceremony starts, it was and always is the uniform group marching in the stadium. Although many may think that the marching and all was boring, I am truly drawn to what is sighted before me then. The different platoons marching to the command given in Malay. They were all so organised together. Their faces were all the same, seriousness is the word. The parade commander was so impressive that I instantly felt in love with him even though he is a guy. The command he gave to the different platoons gave me a trigger down my spine. Everyone who was wearing the uniform followed his command without any error. He is the leader, he is the man. Because of that, I aspire to be like him. I hope that one day, I could stand in the National stadium and command the different platoons. Because of this dream, I went to join NPCC in Secondary school. The NDP'01 is the only parade I watch it live, but I was hooked ever since. Every year, August 9, I would not go anywhere but to watch the NDP live on television. Not only that, I would be at home marching to the command given by the parade commander. Some of you may think that I am mad, but this is how I show my love to Singapore during this day. By marching and saluting. Even go to the extent to singing 'Majulah Singapura' together with the live audiences and president. I always felt the atmosphere when I am doing this, I could feel that I am watching the parade live at the stadium. Because of that, every August 9 is the day of joy. Although there are performances and songs sung by the choir of various school, I would still not get sick of the formal parade. Because this is the part where Singapore could show the world how disciplined our people are, how united and ready to fight for Singapore we can be and how multi-racialism is possible within the uniform groups and citizens. We are the pride of Singapore and because of all these factors, I never miss any National Day Parade live on television after NDP'01.

As Singapore is embarking towards being a 44 years young nation, I would like to see that Singapore is still a strictest and fine-ner yet at the same time; racial harmonious, safe environment and definitely a place with lots of fun and excitement country.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY in ADVANCE SINGAPORE !

Below are a video summarising Singapore's past and present into a song.

ENJOY!!!

Ai Ru Chao Shui

Let my wonderful voice accompany you through lonely days. HAHA!

CAUTION: Background conversation are said to be a curse, if you listen to it, you will be curse to have a very bad sore throat hence make you sing awfully.

A whole new Chapter in Life.

10th March 2009 marks the end of me label-ed as an ITE student. For those who does not know, its because I got admitted to Republic Poly using a combined result in O level that I retook a few months back. My dad was relief I could go to poly, my mother are proud of me and so does the family. A few months back when I was still in ITE, dad do not even dare to take the same lift as me when I was wearing the polo tee. Well, I was also skeptical back then about being an ITE student.

Being in ITE lets me learn a lot of things. The education thought me how to be competitive among our classmates, as well as the course mates. The friends in there thought me how to care for one another by teaching the weaker ones in their work despite the tough competition. The lecturers thought us how to be responsible for ourselves and to love ourselves and others selflessly. Also, the whole ITE system thought me how to be confident and proud of ourselves under the constant mocking and prejudices from the eye of the skeptical public.

I've made many friends in this school. They are really true to me especially Weetiong. He will always text me which classroom should I be going whenever I came to school. He would also collect worksheets and mark the attendance for me when I was away from school. He is a very hardworking boy. Always sets a high target for himself and get paranoid very easily. He's the target of classmates in UQ0804D. The apple in the bullies eye and also, the lecturers' pet hence would always get to do extra work compared to us. His character inspired me to study hard and be like him, but also teaches me to be flexible in life. He is definitely someone whom we can learn a lot from. Well, there's also other classmates which thought me a thing or two in life. But if I were to mention all of them, it could really be a very long post.

Like I mentioned above, lecturers thought us lots of things too. Not only in academic wise, but also in life. Miss Annie Koh for especially, thought us how to love our parents. Her stories would be a release of stress from her dry teaching in Business Fundamental and Business Communication. She always have all sorts of stories to tell us, inspire us and to learn from. She is always very true towards each and everyone in the class. Very straight forward that sometimes I tend to hate her. However, looking back, if she's not that true to us, I wouldn't have improve in my character wise and also, the attitude in study. Another lecturer whom inspires me a lot is Mr Jerome Goh. A very successful entrepreneur in his early age, retired before he's 40 years of age and came because he is passionate about teaching thus being a dedicated teacher who is strict when it comes to rules and regulations. I don't deny that majority of my classmates hated him because he always lock us out of the classroom after being late for 15minutes of his lesson. Especially when his lesson always starts at 8 in the morning. For a heavy sleeper like me, I'm always a 'visitor' who are locked outside the classroom and misses most of my 8am lesson. However, it was his firm principle of believing in punctuality that makes me grow as a person. As I said earlier on, I'm a heavy sleeper who tend to be late in meetings. It was him who makes me know the importance of being punctual for any meetings. Punctuality is the first impression in your character that you deliver to people. Hence I'm learning to be punctual at all time despite if its a casual or a serious meeting.

I've benefited a lot in the whole ITE system and am proud that I came to ITE. Mr Jerome Goh has so much faith in me that he chose me as one of the partner for a recycling business together with the elites in my class, Wei Jie and Eugene. When I first heard from Wei Jie that I got selected, joy filled in me and I'm speechless. However, when it comes to business, I learn that we must be patient and cannot rush things or it would backfired. Everything must be well planned and go in a systematic order so that it would be of a smooth flow. This amazing lecturer thought us how we should not go around boasting and telling others about how much we have contributed but to do everything with a silent confidence within us. Like a servant leader which I learnt in Blaze Camp. We will have to serve without complaining and wait for the trees to bear fruits so that we could benefit from it. His way of presenting himself awe me and I'm so inspired that I wish I could be like him in the near future. He is my role model, a mentor that never complains and treat everything with a smile which would never fade.

Having to said all these, I urge those who did not do well for their N or O levels not to be depress as ITE has a really wonderful way in transforming student into a person who are capable of doing anything and who believes in everything is possible with the high level of confidence within. To sum up everything I've learnt in ITE, its 'If you're willing to give it a shot to things that you wanted, you'll definitely succeed in times to come.'

Goodbye UQ0804D

Our fun at home!

Having siblings is always good because you never get bored doing things stupid and laugh like mad together.

My sister found a cool website, so that we could sing in the mic on her laptop together.

I'll let my beautiful voice entertain you in the blog.....

If you want to sing too, go to -> http://www.karaokeparty.com/en/

Have FUN!

Y-Camp Challenge 2008

I've lost touch to this blog for a really long time. Have lots of activities going on in school and outside of school. Just came back from a camp which was supposedly 4D3N, but due to some reasons, it has been cut short. Nevertheless, its a meaningful camp I ever been to, I swear I'm gonna go for the camp again next year!

Thanks to Weetiong for pulling me to join this camp. Frankly speaking, I wasn't very keen to such camp due to the fact that I'm lazy and its holiday. First day of the camp was not really a good experience and I totally show no interest in that camp when we arrived. I'm not as participative as I used to be and whenever there are chance to grab a rest, you would see me. Even if its on the floor. I hide when volunteers told me to help out and when playing games, I'm also the one showing the 'I don't give a damn' look. Probably its because I'm from ITE and everyone in my group were either from good JCs like RJ and CJ. If not, they are from NUS or SMU. Really felt inferior while being with them. Never had I have this feeling before. Their schools really make me feel stupid about myself. However, they seemed to be friendly and approachable. They've been to many camps before and many are camp instructors because they have different camp T-shirts. I was called out by the leaders asking for reasons about the way I acted, but I just shake them off as if nothing happens. The first day was tiring, but there's more to come because beneficiaries would be in this camp the next day.

The second day starts off with bunk mates asking me about why do I set my alarm so early in the morning and disturb them. I was label-ed the Ah Lian Ring tone Boy for that reason throughout the camp. My beneficiaries did not come to the camp because he was sick. So I was beneficiary-less throughout the camp. I was so happy at first because I've no one to take care of which was good. However, I felt sad because that's what the camp is all about. It's about the beneficiaries and not me. However, I treated the other beneficiaries with due respect and really took care of them thoroughly. Although they are very difficult to take care of because of communication barrier, I did not give up and give my best out. Seeing smiles coming from their face really gave me the sense of satisfaction and that also motivates me to want to really take great care of them. I looked after them when they wants to go toilet and also when they are eating. I make fun of myself just to see the smiles and laughter coming from them which was worthy.

The third day was sad because we were told that we are going home due to some reasons. Many beneficiaries were sad because they did not get to experience the high element. One of them didn't want to go home and change to track pants telling us to bring him to the high element. Hearing from a beneficiary saying this really aches my heart because this shows how much he anticipated for this Bi-Annual camp. Many of us just coax him and divert his attention to other stuffs like Milo which was his favourite. Although its just one day getting along together, I still feel like crying when they were on the bus going back. One of the beneficiaries cried and throw tantrums because he wanted to stay in the camp. He even turned violent and pushed me.

Being with these beneficiaries really make me felt that my life is perfect compared to them. Although I may have setbacks, but it was nothing compared to theirs. It makes me also want to appreciate my life even more and wants to serve for them as a volunteer. This Y-Camp Challenge really makes me mature and see the different sides of life. Although they are disabled, doesn't mean they are unable. Many of them could really take care of themselves and be independent. They are able to communicate with their buddy and ask for what they want which I thought was impressive. We were expecting the worse when we met them, but they prove to us what they could do and could even do better than us which I felt lousy myself. However, I would like to stay active and be a volunteer so as to learn more and see more.

NOTICE.

WILL NOT BE BLOGGING ANYMORE...

However, this blog will still exsits if I change my mind in the near future.

Blaze Camp.

It has been a long time since I've blogged. Was just plain lazy but couldn't bear to close down my blog. Therefore, I'm here to blog again. This time is about my 3days 2nights in the Blaze/NACLI Camp. Its a camp set up to nurture young leaders and I am one of the few who got selected.

Before going to the camp, I have already had a rough idea on what the camp was going to be like. I was dissuaded by many friends to joining them in other activities and abandoned the camp. They gave me all sorts of reason like it was a classroom based camp and you would have to attend lectures which would bore you. And since its the school vacation, why not join them to have fun instead of attending such boring camp? At first, I was eager to be with friends and forget about the camp. However, I deter and stop thinking of what my friends have said.

I assembled early in school because I chose to take the bus provided by the school to go to the camp site which is located at Buona Vista South. We boarded the bus at 10am and reached our destination 1 hour later. I've got a few friends who joined the camp too, but we were all split into different groups. Given my outgoing personality, I got no problems making new friends.

Yes, indeed the camp has lecture. But the lectures were fun and filled with laughter with almost everyone so readily to speak up. I self-introduced myself as a 'shy boy' just to add on with more laughter in the class. And throughout the 3days or even till now, my nickname as a shy boy still sticks with me. However, its not because I'm shy.

First day in Blaze Camp.

We had to decorate our own lanyard to label ourselves and since I'm called as 'Ah dick' by most of my mates in school, I wrote that. That lanyard thingy brought lots of laughter to camp mates from all the different groups. The first lesson taught to us was being a 'servant leader'. The lecturers showed us a movie of two particular African tribal group that were at war and that no international allies help except for one person who is a hotel manager. After watching the movie, we were given 15minutes to plan for a skid so that we could act out in front of the class. Our skid theme is 'Empathy and Acceptance'. Being such a drama queen, I gave lots of ideas to my group members on what they must do and how am I going to react. But however, we still stick to me being a shy boy without and friends in our skid. Although it may sound boring to some people, but the classes conducted are really fun. After that, the facilitator showed us to our room and we were all surprised. Four people in each room and there is a bathroom, heater, hair dryer, wardrobe, balcony and even air-conditional. Its more like a holiday than a camp to me. After lunch, we were called into the learning lounge a.k.a hall to play our games. I was the star player for my team in dodge ball, was in the ninth heaven when my facilitator mentioned that to me. After the games, we had our dinner and off we go for the amazing race. My team came up to be the first to complete the race and that was really great satisfaction for me and my team. Everyone in the team got to be a leader at least once to plan and strategise about the places we are going and the how the games are suppose to be play. It was a long night for me but a wonderful one. I went to have my sleep with a smile across my face knowing that we are the champion.

The bed I slept on from 02/07 - 04/07

Second day in Blaze Camp.

We got up as early as 8am to go for our morning exercises before proceeding to our breakfast. It was a long day and an enjoyable one for us. By now, I got my own clique and we stick closely to each other and tell jokes. I remember making the girls laugh till one got choke and the other cried and beg me to stop my jokes. I never knew I could be so humorous. We proceeded back to classes to learn about different types of leaders. This time, we have to draw without using any words about what a leader should be like. Those selected drawings must explain to the whole class what does his/her drawing stands for. Also, we were scattered to other groups to solve a problem together. We also get to discuss which leaders really impacted our life the most and we were the only group to state that its our parents. After what we've done, we were told that each team must come out with a name, cheer and performance. And every individual must give a speech on this year's theme - My hero, My leader. This time round, Nana was the leader trying to think of what we are suppose to perform. The boys who are supposedly rehearsing for the stomps are playing basketball sweating like pigs. But we still did pretty well and did not screwed up while performing. Our team was also awarded for the champion in game and I am so proud of it. The night did not just end here. We (The clique) sneaked out of the room to play soccer in the basketball court when the facilitator said lights off. When we saw the facilitators patrolling, we ran and hide from their sight. However, we still get caught as we knocked the room of the facilitators thinking that its our friends. We got lectured by the facilitators and off I went to have a wonderful sleep.

My Cliques!

Nurturing leader in progress!

Ready to PERFORM!

Last day in Blaze Camp.


We assembled early and there were no morning exercises as we need to check out of our room earlier than the given time slot. We went for team building and we need to play games that involved a lot on teamwork. We set the highest record for the Moonball activity. Our team got further split into two groups for other games and activities but we were still helping one another knowing that we are a team. Although there was one particular game called the Trolley that makes everyone quarrel and hurl vulgarities at one another, but after the game, we still are one. That what makes a team right? Everyone changed to the Camp polo tee upon getting ready to go home. Everyone received a certificate upon completing the Blaze Camp and I reckoned that everyone went home with a happy memories that we wouldn't want to forget for the rest of our life, right?

Trolleys!

Reflections.

This camp certainly makes me a stronger person with a stronger mindset. What mattered to me most now is not about winning, but the process we went through with the sweat that we shed. I also learned that failures and successes are just differentiate between a thin line. Life is tough, we cannot have everything that we want but that doesn't mean we couldn't achieve it. This Camp experience certainly makes me a much more responsible person in life and also a confident leader and a team player whom everyone would want to respect and adored.

Lessons learnt being a dealer.

I always thought being a dealer in a casino is easy as ABC. I always have this mindset that those who are spending their money signing up for courses tailored to casino dealers are stupid. And I always believe that everyone who is intelligent enough could be a dealer.

I was totally wrong with the mindset I've mentioned above. Being a dealer is no easy task, especially when you have to put on a professional image in front of the people who are playing. These people are not just here to win, but to pressurize the dealer till he go haywire and breakdown. These people would keep rushing you and making sure you are breaking in cold sweat. These people are what we call, gambler.

Today's event is all about what I just typed. My friends and I went to Marina South Pier to meet up with the Event Coordinator. He is a friendly chap. We discussed on who gets to do what before we board the ship. Everything was going perfectly well. I got the game, Black Jack. I know all the rules and regulations and am ready to give my best shot. We boarded the ship and set up our gambling stalls. These stalls that I'm talking about is perfectly legal because there was no involvement in monetary terms. These games are just for people who play purely for leisure. They need 'chips' to play the game.

Upon arrival at Marina South Pier.

Us with the friendly Event Coordinator.

It was a three stories high cruise. - The first level is for the people to have buffet. The second level is for the people to gamble and chit-chat. The third level is for the VIP to gamble and chit-chat. I was the first dealer to be bankrupt due to the high level of pressuring by the VIP and also, the noise level. I remembered running to the second level desperately to find 'chips' to save my Black Jack stall, but to no avail because every dealers were at the losing hand. I am so embarrassed when I ask the Event Coordinator to write me two IOU containing $14,000 and $20,000 chips respectively. My stall was the first one to wind up and thus, helping my partner in the 'Big Small' stall.

The bow ties are on.

Through this event, I learnt that Singaporeans are all risk takers. They would kill the banker with one 'showhand'. I also learnt that educational level has nothing to do with your behavior in public. They are all equipped with at least a degree but they speak in such uncivilized manner. However, there are some who would speak up for you if they are too much.

Having learn so many things in just 7hours of event really makes me a better person. At least I would not talk in an uncivilized manner and always treat everyone equally regardless of their qualifications. Last but not least, I would like to end this post with a quote from my Secondary School English Teacher.

"We must always aim as high as the sky, for as we fall, we would land on the clouds."

Farewell Panda!

Whenever I'm at Changi Airport, thoughts of those friends whom I see off came flowing through my head. It was always a sad event. Today was no different, Panda(Rabindra) was leaving for Australia, Melbourne to further his studies.

Panda!!

He was always a great student in class and a great friend outside. He likes to laugh a lot and that is why everyone was so comfortable having him around. His laughter never fails to warmth my heart. I still remember we had a 'heart to heart' talk during chalet'07. He told me lots of things. This really makes me touched as he treat me as a trusted friend. In my opinion, he's someone who hides his emotional feelings from others because he didn't like other people to worry about him. He always put himself in others' shoe so that he would not make anyone unhappy. I never seen him flare up at others before. He is a selfless boy who would do anything to make his friends' day a colourful one, I supposed. I never regret having him as a friend, I bet no one would ever regret.

The trusted friend!

There was the usual group sending him off in Terminal 3. We meet up together to give Panda a surprise as he do not know our plan yet. However when he saw us at the airport, he was not surprise. This is what I call real friend. Through so many years together as a group, he had understood us inside out, hence the normal look on his face. I could feel that he is sad and do not want to leave Singapore or us. We had our dinner together and it was a really fun one. There were little seats available, Emilia took the initiative to ask if she could bring some table over to our side so that we could sit together as a group. We chit-chatted a lot and kept asking when he would be back.

Last dinner with him.

Till Death do us apart.

Previously a very large group, now it has reduced its size to only a few people. Everyone is leaving Singapore for their home or future. Maybe one day, everyone would be back together and never leave each other. This group is just like a family to me and it saddened me to see so many of the members leaving. I strongly believe that distance would definitely make our friendship stronger and bonded together. Whatever it is, I know Panda would always remember this group of friends he once shared his joy and laughter with.

We will miss you!

Funs I had with ITE mates.

I'm getting more and more involved in my school lives. I adored my classmates and found them really fun to be with and that we unite as a class. Fun after fun, and I know there would be more to come.

Celebrated Rebecca's birthday in school, reckoned that she was touched by what we've planned. Whole class chipped in a dollar for the cab fare and the birthday cake. Few of our classmates then rush down to some places to get the cake during break. Kinda reminds me of my secondary school days as Meilinda would be the one planning the surprises for the birthday girl/boy. When everything was okay, everyone was called to the third level and Rebecca came too. Whole class was there. We sung her a happy birthday song. So enjoyable and fun. Our class recently found a common interest, which is to tease Wee Tiong, the shy boy of our class. Even our Class Advisor joined in the fun. The shy boy is afraid to talk to girls and he would shiver in fear if we push him towards the girls. Now because of him, our class is called as one.

The birthday girl, Rebecca.

Class photo with birthday girl.

Our class also joined the 'Nebo'08 Amazing Race.' Majority of my classmates were there when I turned up. I love the part where everyone looks at us when we cheered 'QD' before going our way. My group - Shawn, Eugene and Weijie came in earlier than the rest of the classmates. During the race, everyone kept telling me to endure and run. Due to the fact of being stubborn, we did not get any prize. It was my fault, I apologize for the lack of determination. I would definitely try harder next time. The race also let me realised that my classmates are very supportive and fun-loving. Like what I mentioned earlier on, they really unite as one.

Before the race started.

After the 'QD Cheer.'

I felt that I'm really lucky to be in this class. I hope that our friendship would keep blossoming and that we would always be a pillar to one another. Last but not least, I love QD.

ITE Lifes..

It has been a month since I started my life as an ITE student. Classmates are friendly in general. However, I still could not believe the fact that I'm an ITE student. But I'll have to face the reality.

Being in a class filled with fun and laughter is really enjoyable, especially during Business Fundamental lesson which is usually dry and boring. Being a POA student gives me an advantage of knowing it first hand. Teaching those who are weaker really gave me the sense of achievement and I'm proud of it!

There are many times when I'm very full of myself which I hated it most. I do not know why I acted in this manner, but it comes naturally. I knew that being such a proud person would cause many troubles and many of your friends would start drifting away from you. And so, I've been trying really hard to tone myself down. I also need to be more hardworking instead of staying in school for pool session till late evening.

Lecturers are very concern about us and always help us should we encounter any difficulties. But locking us outside the class when we are late is unforgivable. No choice but to live with it. I got to stop disturbing girls in my class too, I found the girls very understanding as they did not tell me off yet, but I'll still try my best not to disturb them during lesson. I apologise to those I've irritated and thank you for being so friendly with me all the time!

Recently, I've been spending time shedding those fats off as my friends kept laughing at me. I'm a very self-conscious boy for your information and I take comments from friends very seriously. Well, I'm determined to slim down and hopefully I could succeed. Besides that, sorry for the lack of updates. This blog is not dead yet, I'm just busy with my own stuffs recently. I'll try my best to update! Please give me some time people. Alright?

The class which filled with fun and laughter with Miss Belinda Ng.

Graduation Video.

Bartley 5N1'07 batch.

Together We Can Achieve.

The Pines Gathering.

Met up at 'The Pines' for Emilia's early birthday celebration. Was accompanied by Gabriel and Hoiyan. Eye of envy listening to Gabriel's poly lives. Seeing them comparing the orange Ez-Link card really made me regret not studying hard enough in Secondary school.


Arrived late upon our destination due to the fun we had in bus, thus missed the stop. The group was waiting for us to sign the big birthday card. Saw a couple of friends, went to said hello. Feelings wasn't the same as before. Maybe its because we are of different educational standered. However, became relaxed as they did not treat me any differently. When they are exchanging their poly stories, I felt outcasted. Went up to them and told them how jealous I am, seeing them in polytechnic. They consoled me and told me its alright. Encourage me to study hard and I would be of the same track as them soon. Words from them really made the tears form in my eyes. I want to be like them, enjoying the same school lives. But I can't.



We took lots of pictures together as a form of memories. Hopefully these memories would not fade off in me or anyone of them as time passes. They are once my motivator, my pillar of strength and my shoulders. They are all bright students whom could make it big in future. What am I to them? An entertainer who brings them joy? Or am I really one of them? I don't know, but for what I knew, they are once important people in my life. I would remember this till the very last breath.

Although we did not keep very much in contact with. But I know when I'm in times of crisis, these 'pillars' would still stand by me and give me the emotional support I need like before, to pull me through. I believe in them, because that's what friends are for. Right?

Tribute to : Meilinda, Hoiyan, Weihao, Ericsson, Rabindra, Gabriel, Chorheng, Jianyu, Jamlin, Milan, Darwin and Emilia.

Caution : Not to Sleep in MRT.

I would do crazy stuffs that would make people mad once in a blue moon. I was on my way home with Xinsheng in the MRT, and I had these thoughts of disturbing this boy who is sleeping soundly in the train.

Lets welcome Sleeping beauty in the MRT!

After I did this, I get more n more excited and wanting to take more pictures with him. I seldom do crazy stuffs. I consider this crazy because I always have 'no balls' to do such things as I do not want to get into trouble. On the other hand, Xinsheng felt very bad, but compiles to it. Poor Xinsheng had to endure the stares given by the passenger in the MRT.

Imitating his sleeping.

I reckoned he knew that he had been made fun of, but he's unsure about it. Because he would get up once in a while to take a look at the surrounding. After Xinsheng 10 counting, he would doze off and his head would drop down and sleep again. Guessed life in the working industry ain't easy huh?

You! Yes you! Can't you see I'm making fun of you!?

Thanks to the accomplice, Xinsheng for making our 16minutes journey a wonderful one. Not forgetting to thank the boy whom I made fun of.

Thank you Sleep Beauty

PS : This is just a joke, sorry if I've offended anyone of you out there. I know it's childish to do this, but it's a form of entertainment for me. I sincerely apologised to the boy I've make fun of.

1st day of ITE.

Okay, first day of school, not really what I expected. I expected to see lots of 'Ah Bengs' in my class, expected to hear vulgarities being shouted across the auditorium, expected to see many with skinny jeans and slippers and expected many in my class to be rowdy. But, no. They were bunch of quiet people, sitting quietly on the seats while listening to every words the speaker said as though they are in a church enlightening by the pastor.

When we proceeded to playing game, my classmates were shy and so, the game was not well played. However, being the odd one who is friendly, outgoing and with an elephant thick skin, I start the ball rolling by making fun of the 'Bridge Leader' - doing some stupid faces which irritated some of my classmates I reckoned. After that, game went on smoothly and lots of laughter could be heard in this class of mine. Everyone knows my name and therefore, sabotaging me and making those beside me suffer the consequences. Well, too bad, I lost in the last round and had to do a forfeit which is to spell my name, Dickson with my bottom. I accepted the forfeit and proceeded to doing something which I couldn't believe I was doing. Imagine doing something so stupid in front of a 42strangers whom you met for just a few hours. The feeling was horrible. After that 'performance', my face went cherry red.

Did I mention about being recognized by one of my primary four classmate? The feeling was so great. She asked if I am Dickson. With a puzzled look, I ask who is she. She told me she is the one whom always got bullied by me in Primary school. I was so glad that she still remembers me and treated me as her friend. There is a girl, Suzy whom is very friendly too. I reckoned she will be a top student in my class. She is caring towards me, her friendly gesture warmth my heart and from that moment, I knew she would be a very good friend of mine. There are still more people I would like to share with you. But guessed I'll keep you in suspense and await for the upcoming post.

Being in ITE isn't a bad choice after all. Not all students are bad like we think they are. Singaporeans are just being stereotype. Hoping I will excel in ITE. I need to work hard, work hard and work hard. Hopefully, this two years will be a fruitful experience to me. *pondering*

The Truth.

After my BFF, Xinsheng left for China on a vacation trip. I realised one thing. I do not have many friends. My sister told me that she reckoned he is my only friend. Because I only spent my time with him, goes out with him and enjoy with him. Not many friend calls me after he left except if they need any help from me. I began to understand what my mother's neighbour told me.

He told me God gave us ten fingers for a reason. The reason is that in life, you will only have ten friends or less. And if you have more than that, they ain't your friends, but someone who would take you for granted and used you. He owns a pub couple of years ago and travel to lots of countries. He is loaded and often treat his 'friends' to restaurants and KTV. When his friends are in need, he would fork out a lump sum of money to help them. He is a very generous and humble man. After his business went downhill, he became penniless and had to take over his mother's job in a neighbourhood selling clothes. There will be one or two friends coming by and talk to him occasionally, and they are always the same people. So, he told me not to put in too much trust in what do we term as 'friends'.

I have no friends. After all those party-ings with my secondary school mates and gatherings. I found out that we ain't really close actually. I cleared my phone list upon graduating and so do they. When I text them, they would ask me who I was, and vice versa. I reckoned that we are all very fake towards one another. We would be smiling and chatting away happily but when we were alone, we would forget about everything. So overall, I only have Xinsheng as my friend and my real friend, I hoped.

So lastly, I would said that not everyone are true towards you and also, the other way round. Do not trust someone so easily because there would be consequences. When there is someone out there who is true towards you as a friend, grab hold of that someone and who knows he/she would be your 'lucky star' for the long run in Life.

Time to Wake Up.

It's been a long time since I blogged. My life is the same everyday. Work, eat, sleep and all over again. Now that I had stopped working, I'm back to blogging. Today, I went back to my secondary school to receive my O level cert. When I walk towards the school gate, my heartbeat became faster and louder. I don't know why.

I went into the office to get my cert, while waiting, I saw Mr Chin. Immediately, my heart stopped. Felt very guilty because I flung my O level. He was right, I bound to be in ITE. He gave me a pat on the shoulder and told me that I've improved tremendously. Hearing him said that makes my tears formed in my eyes. I saw my favourite teacher, Mr Ng. He was someone who was very patient to me. Always advise me to find him if I need help and never failed to encourage me if I failed his subject. It's really hard seeing all these teachers who have once helped you and in return, you disappoint them. Thoughts started flowing through my mind and memories of being a student in Bartley secondary formed. I always thought too highly of myself that I do not allow any advice given to me and ignored helps from my peers and teachers.

After walking around the school, I suddenly woke up. If I would be a student in Bartley again, I would listen to the teachers' advices, hand in assignments on time and always do my best in every tests. It's really hard walking into your formal school if you have had failed in that school. I reckoned this is the biggest lesson I learnt in life and I will wake up from my dreams and do my best in everything which are important. I will be successful one day. I will make a name for myself one day. I will hold my head high up and tell people about my route to success one day. This day would come but only if I wake up now. It's time to wake up.